I kissed my best friend (im a girl and he is a guy)?

Well a few weeks ago me and him kissed when we were playing the game nervous. We acted like it never happened. Then yesterday we went fishing( he lives next door to me) at some pond with my sister and brother and his friends. When were on the way home me Dillon(my best friend) and my sister sat with me in the middle.I have really long arms so I stretched them over the top of the seat. He then grabbed my waist and pulled me closer to him and I leaned into him.I only like him like my brother,so when he kissed my head I froze. Then he practically has me sitting on his lap. And now he keeps hugging me but says he is thinking about asking my friends Reana or Sydney out but I said okay and he got up and left. A few weeks ago I asked him out on a dare and he said no and that he thought of me only as a friend. I told him Reana told me to do it on a dare. But now that we are out of school he is being really weird. I just can't handle it. I recently moved away from a person who I was absolutely crazy about. His name was Clayton and we were like complete and totally in love .... Dillon is almost exactly like him and I can't handle it. I still love Clayton and every time I look at Dillon I think of Clayton. When me and Dillon kissed I was comparing him to Clayton... I need help. Should I forget about Clayton or not. And I don't know if Dillon likes me . I recently found where Clayton lives and he doesn't live far from me. I talked to Dillon about him and he said "Your in love with him still aren't you?" And I couldn't say no or that would be a lie and he seemed like he was deep in thought.Could he like me or not??? I really like Dillon but I LOVE Clayton but he moved and now has a girlfriend. I can't get over him or Dillon. I need advice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!